Can I be traced by my email address?

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I think it's an absolute hoot that this cretin thinks he can get her in trouble with the law for messing up his day off. Since when has "standing someone up" been illegal?
OTOH, if this fellow keeps it up, HE could be in heap big trouble with the law. Harassment? Stalking? Yep, those things are illegal. If he makes some other kind of threat, he could be in trouble for that, too.
This article doesn't belong on "Ask Leo!" It belongs on Randy Cassingham's "THIS is TRUE". The guy's a total obliviot.

First I must say I thought it was hilarious that the person was going to call the police on the other for ruining his day.

I wish I could do that when someone ruins my day

Other than that Leo one thing you should mention in this article is that many of the free email providers show the ip address of the sender in the headers. So if the person you emailed has this they can potentially get a lot of information if they key it in at arin.net. Possibly where you work if that is listed on the record. Also if they do a tracert that can give them some info too. So even if you have a totally anonymous free throwaway email you still can share info to someone who is really looking.

True, although as I've written many times, IP tracing isn't nearly what people think it is. The average person can get very little useful information (though law enforcement, of course, can).

23-Sep-2009

Leo, you always have great things to list!

I have a "generic" email address for signing up on new sites/downloads/etc - fake personal info is listed. Even more private - have a PO Box to use online for ordering, etc.

I'm wondering when she found out he had a wife - in time not to meet (that's why she didn't), or if before, why would she agree to meet him? From the wording in her email, he's an adulterous control freak, my guess - possible future stalker.

Another site that makes it very easy to track people, if you have a name, is Zabasearch. Even if you have taken pains to hide your location, Zabasearch uses public records to display your home address and home phone number. Very scary...

OMG, threatening to report someone to the police because he listened to his intuition and didn't hang out with this, what, narcissistic sociopath???

I'd consider writing back the question submitter and telling him to 1. document everything that happened including the threats made by Mr Sociopath. 2. Talk to the police about everything Mr Sociopath said and did - not necessarily file a complaint, but tell the police what happened so they know what Mr Sociopath is up to. 3. Stop using Criagslist for meet-ups because there are way too many sickos there. Instead, start interacting with real people IRL and learn how to watch their faces and body language to see what they're real intentions are. Aka, communicate with people over a period of time before ever again agreeing to meet up with them in person.

Remember, bullies get a sick thrill out of hurting other people. If they're targeting us, we can try ignoring them, not giving them that thrill - be ''boring prey'' and see if they go away. If they won't leave us alone, we need to hit them back hard enough by, ie, involving the police, to get them to stop harassing us.

The easiest way to deal with bullies is to simply stay off their radar in the first place. Stop responding to Craigslist personals.

Linda,

Although the original query is not entirely clear, the response makes it obvious: the person asking the question is not a woman but a man.

Still hard to imagine that someone is going to meet another, without knowing anything about them- but do know that they are already married. Where are your morals? If you were married, would you like someone fooling around with your spouse?

There are so many creeps, stalkers, murderers out there, why would anyone take a chance?!?

Yes, I know, this is 2009... but tragidies happen every day. Some can be prevented with a thinking ahead.

I agree with Mike. Plenty of people had stood me up before. The police would be really busy if standing someone up is illegal.

Zabasearch only works for US addresses.
pipl.com can track you down for any postings you ever made on the internet using any of the following searches- Your name, your username, your email address or your phone number.
People really need to wise up on what they post about themselves on the web.
That photo of you falling over drunk at a Christmas party will not be so funny when a prospective employer finds it before your interview.

I am in agreement with Linda about the possibility that he may be a stalker.

Quite frankly, I would pass the messages from him on to the police. Even though they are not a physical threat, they are a threat and it is a thin line with some of these people between stupid threats (unless you did something illegal, the police will laugh at him) and physical. His frustration (especially if the police laugh at him) could push him over the edge.

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